my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
We are all done wearing pants today
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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