Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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