Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
