Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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