So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
