I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
