So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
