im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
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