1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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