do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
