Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
