hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
