Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize