That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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