i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize
