dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
