I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
