Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
how drunk are you?
Several
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
