You're completely useless in the revolution.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
