just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
