i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
