i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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