I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
