We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
