we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
