I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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