So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
