Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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