she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
