We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
