We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
