Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Is it because I queefed?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize