told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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