We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
