Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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