quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
