when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
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