I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
