I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize
