I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
We are all done wearing pants today
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
