between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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