yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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