I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
