This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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