bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
