is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
