So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
So many bounce houses so little time
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
