I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
