no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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