But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
You can't just leave with hair like that
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
