So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
