You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
