Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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