Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize